In a really complicated and stressful situation. To make a long story short, I have a mother who is Power of Attorney and Health Care Proxy of father in nursing home where rest of family suspects abuse. We want to move him but she objects. The proxy has been invoked after his stroke. He still appears competent to us, has not been deemed incompetent, we do not believe his wife has the best intentions for him. She is in another state, unable and unwilling to work. She is mentally ill with a caregiver, is not allowed to touch her own money, yet she receives disability and still has power over my dad's health and money in another state, is this even legal?