Legal Question in Family Law in Missouri
divorce, child visitation
The divorce decree states that visitation is to be "reasonable". Children are 14, 19 and 20, all in-school or college. Iam paying $750. per month child support. Problem is, How do you define reasonable? My exwife has custody of the children, and I don't get to see the children. It may be two or three months at a time between visits. I now live three hours away. I call e-mail or send letters to set up visits but they cancel out or I see them for an hour or two only. The divorce took two years to work it's way thru court. Ex-family influence is very strong. At the time of the divorce I lost my job but was assigned an income of $32,000. to determine the amount of child support. When the divorce was complete I was told that I was $15,000. behind on child support and have yet to pay that off. My income at the time was $20,000. This year I will earn approx. $30,000. I do pay for health insurance which is not defined or required. She garnished the division of assets (sale of home), my pay check and bank account. Her Mother was the only other person involved in the break up of the marriage. Both myself and ex-spouse are still single. I was found to be verbally abusive, thus lending to weighted distribution of assets and child rearing privlages. What can be done?
4 Answers from Attorneys
Child Support and Reasonable Visitation
It sounds like the court imputed income to you, that is, it treated you as making greater income than you actually do. That usually only happens when you are voluntarily unemployed or underemployed and it can be shown that you have the potential to earn more. Unless you have experienced a change in your financial situation since the last order, it is unlikely that you can ask the court to modify the amount of child support that you owe. Since the court did not require you to pay health insurance, if the child support is too high, you may want to consider dropping the health insurance coverage and requiring your ex-wfe to cover it from her child support.
"Reasonable visitation," like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. There are so many factual differences that it is impossible to say in any given case what is reasonable. Although we normally think of alternate weekends and shared holidays as reasonable, for people who are several hours away, holiday time and specified telephone visitation may be the only ways to really have good visitation with the children. I know of one man who was so determined to spend time with his son that he moved every time his ex-wife moved away and started over again in a new location. It is hard for him, but it is proof of his desire to place his relationship with his son ahead of any personal considerations such as wealth or convenience.
Reasonable Visitation
I'm not licensed in Missouri, but the situation you describe regarding the two of you being unable to agree to what constitutes "reasonable" visitation is very common in all states. If the two of you really can not come to an agreement on what the schedule should be, I suggest that you make an effort at agreeing on the PROCEDURE to reach an agreement -- perhaps agreeing to let the CHILDREN decide, or agreeing to allow a thrid party you both trust decide and then being bound by that decision with an Agreed Order to Modify you would file with the Court (if no family member or friend is willing to take on this role, perhaps a church pastor might, or a paid mediator or counselor -- all of these options are quicker and less expensive and less confrontational than hiring lawyers and heading off to argue things in court). But failing all of that, if the Final Decree says "reasonable visitation" and you two can't agree to what that is, get an attorney and head back to court and get the court to put down an order.
MO Child support
what county are you in?
The court will define the term if it is not working out. Tough to get teenagers to do anything though.
Maybe I can help.
ss
Reasonable Visitation
Two of your children are adults and you can arrange visitation with themdirectly. You no longer have to deal with your ex-wife for contact withthem. As to your 14 year old child, reasonable depends upon manyfactors. In most cases, once a week or once every other week isconsidered reasonable. You should be able to have weekend visitationand more substantial visitation during school vacation time. However, ifyou and your ex do not agree, you will have to go to court to resolve thedifferences. As to the money, you can seek a modification based uponyour current finances. In my state, a modification cannot change pastorders only future so this will not help you with your arrears. You maybe able to get credit or partial credit for the insurance and reducefuture payments as a result. However, any time you go to court youshould consider the cost of going to court against the benefits to begained.
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