Legal Question in Family Law in Rhode Island

What can be done about having my son's fathers visitation getting adjusted? My son stays with his father every weekend, at his aunt's house, because his father does not have a place of his own. This past weekend an incident happened which makes me not want our son to sleep over there anymore. My son's father's mother slit her wrists, the cops were called, and my son basically saw something that I feel he should not have seen. I want to try to speak to his father in a civil manner, but I just know that he is going to flip out when I tell him that our son will not be spending the weekends sleeping at his sister's house(which is also where he lives, his mother lives, three teenagers, and his sister's husband lives.) Not to mention two out of the four adults that live in that house are always drinking and abusing prescription drugs. I just need some advise on how to go about this without having to go back to court. I cannot afford a lawyer right now, but I want my son to feel safe and I feel that being in situations like that as well as others, that he is not safe. I also do not think that environment is a good one for him to be around. Please help.


Asked on 12/03/12, 4:43 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys

Christopher Pearsall Law Office of Christopher A. Pearsall, Esquire

You can file a Motion to Modify Visitation in the court. I understand that you don't want to return to court but if the child's father has court ordered visitation then you must return to court to modify it. You can't change the visitation unilaterally by your own decision.

While I am not unsympathetic since I am an advocate for children, You mentioned quite a few things here. Other questions were not answered. Though there are other questions here are the questions that I believe would be most relevant under the circumstances

(1) What is the age of the child?

(2) What did the child actually witness?

(3) Did the father have time to prevent the child from seeing the detrimental things?

Remember that the visitation is between the father and the son. Even if the father lives in the same household, if the father could not prevent or did not have time to prevent the son from seeing Grandma slit her wrists then there may not be a basis for asking the court to reduce the overnights.

If the visitation every weekend has occurred while you were supposedly aware about everything else (except Grandma slitting her wrists) then you acquiesced to the rest of the conduct. To bring it up at a later date to prevent overnight visits may not be viewed by the court as a reasonably substantial change in circumstances warranting a change in visitation.

Now, if the visitation for the father is not spelled out in a court order and you are the designated placement parent by a court order, then you normally have the right to talk to the father and let him know that his overnights need to stop for a while for the benefit of the child. Keep in mind that if the child has a good bond with his father, then you do not want to damage that bond just as the father should not be damaging your bond with your son.

As for avoiding court, it can't be done that way if it is to be done properly. If the visitation is spelled out in a court order you will have to file a Motion to Modify Visitation alleging that there is a substantial change in circumstances that warrants the modification. You should, however, spell out the circumstances in your motion that constitute the "substantial change in circumstances."

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Answered on 12/04/12, 4:51 am


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