I'm a non custodial parent. My 9 year old has a cell phone his mother has blocked me and my wife from being able to call. I've informed her, because of this, she can keep the phone during my extended summer possession and she can call us to speak to him just like we do her. Now she's making threats, my question is, can I confiscate the phone and mail it back to her if she sends it with him?
2 Answers from Attorneys
You are in control of your child when your child is in your custody. In my opinion, 9 is too young for a cell phone. Tell your child to leave the phone turned off in the child's suitcase and again inform the mother that calls to the child can be made through your phone.
This is not about the child; it is about the parents and power. And I am not taking sides; it could be either parent.
If you two are going to successfully co-parent for the next eleven years, you need to both learn to do so. If possible, see if you can get the other parent to atttend co-parenting-in-divorce classes. You do not have to do them together, but you do need to both do the same ones. There are probably some in your area, but if not, then there are some on the Internet.
If you continue the way that you are going, you both will be miserable for a decade, but, more importantly, the child will suffer.