Legal Question in Wills and Trusts in North Carolina

Since your mother was not married and NC does not recognize common law marriages (many states do not but if your mother lived in a state other than NC with her boyfriend then you need to consult a probate attorney in that state because some states do recognize common law marriage but the requirements for that differ) the answer is no. Your mother is not entitled to any of the boyfriend's money, land or personal property that was solely in the boyfriend's name. It is not fair but that is why we have wills. If the boyfriend wanted to benefit your mother then he could have made a will. He obviously did not make a will leaving things to your mother or else you would not be posting here.

So in answer to your question, I don't know what stuff your mother is being asked to give back or to whom. The proper way to analyze is what kinds of "stuff" we are talking about and how it was titled. If its personal property owned solely by the boyfriend, then yes, your mother is obligated to turn over all assets owned solely by the boyfriend to the personal representative of his estate or his next of kin.

If something was jointly owned, that is another question (like a jointly owned car). In such case, perhaps your mother can either sell her share of the equity in the car to the boyfriend's estate OR can buy the boyfriend's equity share of the car from the boyfriend's estate.

However, probate only applies to probate assets. There are many kinds of non-probate beneficiary designated assets. Life insurance, retirement, jointly owned real estate or joint bank accounts are all examples. So what did the boyfriend have at the time of his death and how was it titled and did he own anything with your mother with a right of survivorship or beneficiary designation such that if something happened to him it would pass to your mother? If so, then she can have that asset.