Legal Question in Family Law in California

Affect of Termination of Parental Rights -

I am in a sticky situation. My daughters biological fathers rights were terminated in 2003 for abandonment. Since that time he has had very little contact with her both because he failed to and because his rights were terminated and he didn't get what that meant. The child is now 15. The bio father contacted my parents and they allowed contact without my consent. So, first - is there anything that can be done about that? Even if its just some choice words to make them think about their actions.

In the meantime, at my reluctance, I have allowed my daughter and her bio father to be in contact with each other. It has caused nothing but disruptions. He continually speaks ill of me, tells me one thing and her another. I am sensitive to the fact that it is her father and she has the desire to know him, but at what cost.

My concern however is this - what is my recourse? After all his standing is as a complete stranger. Are there any legal actions that can be taken so that he cannot have contact with her?

I hope I expressed myself clearly.


Asked on 9/22/10, 10:00 am

1 Answer from Attorneys

Steven Hertz Hertz Steven H.

In order to terminate parental rights you must have a good reason. You have to put forth a case for terminating parental rights which includes showing it is better for the child that they no longer have their other parent. You want your daughter to now begin having contact with her father, and the questions should be whether this is in the child's best interest. Normally when parents don't get along they go to family court and the court can say "You must stop bad talking the other parent." But in your case, no court has jurisdiction to tell the father "you can" or "you can't" do something, unless you go to a civil court, or course and get an injunction. You can't just terminate parental rights and then change your mind. But now what you refer to as a sticky situation is perhaps your discomfort with the choices of terminating parental rights. I would ask "what was the court's reason for doing this?" Was the father a bad person? Is he dangerous for the daughter to be around? Is he likely to be negligent causing injury to this child? Is he hanging around people who are dangerous, and refuses to change his society. But termination isn't to be taken lightly. It is afterall the child's right to know her parent. When you ask "What is my recourse?" it plays like a B movie. You already terminated the parental rights, but now you are dealing with that your daughter wants to have a relationship with her dad, which is normal. You should either terminate or not. Legally speaking, you can't have a shifting position with this. But there is nothing that says you can't allow contacts between your daughter and her dad, if in fact those contacts are in her best interests. However, you do not have to allow them (legally). You may feel obligated because of your conscience, or because she now has developed a relationship with him and you don't want to deprive her of this, or deep down you know its the best thing. There is nothing in the law that says you can't allow them to see each other. Apart from a court order he doesn't have the right to enforce his visits, or whatever it is you are calling his contacts with her. The court would not have any jurisdiction to award him visitation because as far as the court is concerned, she has no father. But there may still be a hearing on the matter of whether the court may reopen the status of parent and enter a new or different ruling, or refrain from making a different one. You might want to consider these two things, from now on: "Is it good for her to visit with her dad?" If it is good, then should he occupy the status of a dad? "Should you be getting some kind of support payments from her father?" Is the relationship good for her? If it has problems, are they the type that should totally end the relationship? What is your daughter learning from your choices in this. Many relationships end because a party has the legal right to terminate. But a relationship was not made this way from the start. It is made to be somewhat flexible on both sides. After considering these things, then decide if you need to go back to court and get an appropriate order that reflects the way the relationships should be.

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Answered on 9/27/10, 7:39 pm


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