Legal Question in Civil Litigation in California

Service of a restraining order

My son's girlfriend has obstained a temporary restraining order against me because she is underage and having sex with my 19 year old son. This girls mother has called my son and told him to stay away from her daughter or she would have him arrested. Well, I found out they are seeing each other in secret and so I have been trying to call her MOTHER to let her know. In order to stop me from telling her mom about this she obtained a bogus restraining order, saying I'm calling her house and harrassing her. The Sheriff has made two attempts to serve me and failed. They are now calling my 15 year old daughter's cell phone to try to find me. She hasn't answered, but I'm wondering if this is legal to involve MY minor child in this? Also, I have recently remarried and my last name is different than what is on the restraining order. Am I splitting hairs, or does it have to contain my true and legal name in order to be in effect? Thanks so much for any help.


Asked on 2/01/08, 2:24 pm

2 Answers from Attorneys

Terry A. Nelson Nelson & Lawless

Re: Service of a restraining order

You've got one hell of a problem that needs proper attention and handling before you end up with a criminal record with serious consequences, like loss of firearms rights and possible effect on your employability. Ignore this and you will regret it for a long time. You need to get counsel and fight this attempt before the order becomes permanent. You need to have the court withdraw and cancel the temporary order, with a finding of factual innocence after a hearing and testimony. You won't likely succeed in doing so pro per. Feel free to contact me if you decide to do this right.

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Answered on 2/01/08, 4:34 pm
Edward Hoffman Law Offices of Edward A. Hoffman

Re: Service of a restraining order

You're splitting hairs about the name issue. The documents clearly refer to you, which is all that matters.

The temporary restraining order ("TRO") is not "bogus" as you say. It is quite genuine. The young woman evidently obtained it by fraud, but the order itself is real and you should not take it lightly.

There will be a hearing on whether to make the TRO permanent, and it sounds like you should be able to defeat it at that time, though you may need a lawyer to help protect your rights. People can only seek restraining orders to prevent contact with themselves or their minor children, not their adult parents (unless the parent is under the child's guardianship). Additionally, your efforts to contact her mother strike me as protected by the First Amendment and by a legal doctrine known as the common interest privilege.

As I said earlier, you should get a lawyer to help you present these arguments to the court. It's easy for a layperson to mess up a restraining order hearing, and the consequences of having one of these ordered in place can be more drastic than you may realize.

Please feel free to contact me if you want to discuss this further.

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Answered on 2/01/08, 3:09 pm


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