My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 years and we have 2 children and one one the way. We are currently discussing moving to another state to be closer to his family. Can we get a letter notarized stating if we do separate I can move the kids back to my home state and will promise equal custody time? And will this be binding by law?
1 Answer from Attorneys
The short answers are yes and no. A notary simply affirms that the persons signing the document have identification that says they are who they say they are. The document may indicate intenet but the fate of the children is dependent on the best interests of the children, not the intent of the parents. If you and your boyfriend separate and don't agree as to the disposition of the kids a court will decide what to do with the kids based on the best interests of the children. It's usually difficult to persuade a court to allow a move of the kids from one jurisdiction to another, i.e., back to New Mexico from another state.
Has your boyfriend acknowledged paternity? Has there been a DNA test? Go to the statutes to see the requirements for establishment of parenthood: NMSA 40-11A. The statutes are found at
or in books in your local library.
You will need a paternity suit to establish paternity and create the basis for a parenting plan (custody and visitation) and child support, which you might think about doing anyway.
If you are thinking that you might separate maybe you ought not to go any further with this guy. Or give the kids a break and get married. Your children deserve a stable home.