Legal Question in Family Law in New Mexico

Re: Rights and Responsibilities as a parent

There are several options open to you for the assistance you seek. However, there are other questions that a lawyer will want to know prior to being able to give you specific advice and a clear sense of direction. You should understand that you are not alone in the situation in which you find yourself and there is help available. You can seek legal advice on your own with your own attorney. (Check my answers to previous inquiries on this bulletin board and you will see how I tell people to find attorneys). Then, if you are low income you can go to the Income Support Division in your city or town and seek public assistance and medicade. The medicade will provide you with the means to obtain the additional nutrients you will need during this time and it will cause the computers over at child support enforcement to begin a legal case against the dad. Child support enforcement will only establish the child support and help collect it from him; they will NOT set up or deal with the visitation issue. (Another option - the one you have been trying - is to work these matters out without having to resort to legal recourse. I suspect you already know where that one is headed).

The visitation issue (otherwise called a parenting plan and physical custody) is something that is pretty difficult to answer in this forum. This is very case specific and needs lots of questions answered by both you and the lawyer. The usual answer though is that while the child is under the age of 3 years most judges will not order overnight visitation. (And, you should not let such a thing happen either). However, if this man wants to have a place in your child's life then there are other ways (besides going to court) to make that happen; most notably is mediation. If he does not follow through with agreements made in a mediated setting then there is no use going to court to make him visit; at that point you would be going to court to keep him away except under fairly strict conditions. The old saying "you can bring a horse to water but you cannot make him drink" applies here. You can set up the situation to allow visits but if the dad doesn't do his part then the empty promises you are concerned about will become reality. That's quite a ways down the track though; let's get through your pregnancy first and come back to this forum in a few months to follow up on visitation matters.

Good Luck to you and your child.