Legal Question in Family Law in North Carolina

Custody Contempt- I received a contempt order from my children's father in the middle of a court hearing for a restraining order. He filled on the 12th. The restraining order ended on the 13th. We had no contact for 10 days prior. There's no details on the contempt. I think he's trying to hold me in contempt because my boyfriend refuses to meet him. We have a custody agreement which states any dating relationship we can't introduce children unless it's been 3 months and have to introduce partner to other party before introducing to children. This relationship was already established and he met the children before the court order. Am I in contempt and can I motion to dismiss due to no specificity on the contempt papers? Also can I dismiss because this was already an established relationship ?


Asked on 1/14/16, 6:40 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys

First things first, he can't hold you in contempt - at least not in the legal sense, only a judge can do that. Second, you can always move to dismiss (in fact, in some cases, you are required to). So, the real question is what are the odds of the motion being granted and in your case, based on the information / reasons you provided - that would be slim and none but possible. Hopefully, you didn't voluntarily enter into that custody agreement - if so, you caused all these problems yourself. Unless that custody agreement was Court ordered, your case is a prime example of why you should never ever enter into such a ridiculously and unnecessarily convoluted agreement which gives a former spouse / partner some sort of power or control to approve or even be informed of your dating relationships. He has absolutely zero business 'meeting' the people you date! I mean for what purpose - so that he can 'approve' of them - what is he your dad? Had you not entered into this agreement, your relationships would be none of his business and he would have to wait until he had evidence that the children were being affected by your relationships before he would have a decent chance of causing you problems in court - and this is how it should be. As it stands now, you may as well have also agreed to seek his blessing and permission for every time you need to fart. As you are now finding out and as is usually the case, he is now using that ridiculous clause to cause you problems very likely because he's a jerk and not for the good of 'the children'. Finally, if that custody agreement wasn't Court ordered, I am going to assume you entered into it without an attorney representing you. If so, you need an attorney - think you can't afford one? As you can see now - you can't afford not to have one. If you did have an attorney - you should likely at least question why that particular clause is there and do something to get it out. Clauses like that are almost always a recipe for disaster. I mean, think about it! The relationship presumably ended because you two at least weren't quite right together. So why in the world would you want him (of all people) to have any input whatsoever into how you conduct yourself after the relationship ended? It almost defeats the purpose of ended the relationship in the first place. And don't say it was for the good of the children - do you honestly think this ridiculous legal action he now has you engaged in due to that stupid agreement and the stress / financial damage it potentially does is 'good for the children'? I assure you it is not. Heck, you are ironically very likely doing more damage to the children because of that agreement than if you were dating a straight up crack head. Get a lawyer and get that jerk out of the decision making process of your personal life so that you, the children, your boyfriend and even his own sorry self have a better chance of moving on and being happy Best of luck to you!

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Answered on 1/14/16, 11:03 pm


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