Legal Question in Family Law in California

Hi, I live in San Diego California. I've been married for 8 yrs. and have a daughter who will turn 4yrs. July 7th. Anyway, I've been seperated from my husband since Dec. 31st 20011 and I'm living in a condo and the lease expires the end of July. My question is...My daughter was going to preschool part time two days a week and is now going to start at another school Mon. June 11th. I'm worried that by my daughter starting at that new preschool...in case my husband decides to get divorced before or by the time my lease is up at the end of July...that the court would tell me that she needs to stay in that school to avoid anymore changes in her life. Is it legal if my husband signs a written agreement saying she will not be forced to stay in that school if he and I were to divorce? Would that have any legal value? I plan in moving south about 25 min. away from his house which was mine as well. I told him that I don't want to drive 2 hrs a day the two or three days I have her just because he wants her at that school and I agreed to it before I thought that if he's divorcing me...I'd like to be near my family for support and help with my daughter when need be. His family lives like 5 and 10 min. away from his house...so yes, this is a good school district and the schools may not be the best...but it would be fair to have her go to a preschool halfways to where we both live if in case of a divorce...right? What would a judge say about our situation? We've had her 50/50 since we've been apart and she gets mad at me whenever I'm taking her to stay with her daddy. She loves being with me because I took care of her for 3 1/2 years 24/7 since my husband and I agreed that I would stay home with her...I was a preschool teacher for 12 yrs. prior to having my daughter. Haven't worked since then. He's been pushing me to get a job as soon as he gets my daughter into school full time and I'm worried that he wants to do that so that he could screw me over with paying me less alimony since I'd be working at a job that would be paying me very little(preschool teaching) when it comes down to him wanting to then wait until I get a fulltime job and then follow thru serving me with the divorce papers. What is your advice in what I'm having him sign tomorrow morning saying he won't expect her to continue at that school if we were to get divorced. And what do you think about the other concerns as well? Pls help me...he's an attorney and I'm afraid because I'm very naive. I just don't want him to screw me over...I'd like to be near my family for support and now he called me selfish for not thinking of my daughter first. Me speaking up is a new thing...I always agreed with him for the same purpose to avoid conflict...he always wanted me to speak up and now that I'm working on that...he calls me selfish.

Pls help me. Is that paper worth anything if he and I sign it? Is it worth anything to the judge? Should I avoid working until he gives me an answer about either trying to make our marriage work or filing for divorce? What should I do about work? Please anything you tell me will be greatly appreciated.


Asked on 6/05/12, 10:16 pm

1 Answer from Attorneys
Rhonda Ellifritz Law Offices of Rhonda Ellifritz

I am not sure the paper is worth anything. If you take her and enroll her someone else, there is no court order violation right now, and even if he signs something, it all comes down to a question of what is in your daughter's best interests. Yes, it is advantageous for you to have a job because he then pays less child support and spousal support. He is also changing to a 50/50 timeshare because that lowers the amount as well. If he is an attorney, you need to get your own. He has already manipulated this situation to his advantage. For further information, visit http://www.ellifritzlaw.com

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Answered on 6/05/12, 10:57 pm


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