Legal Question in Family Law in Massachusetts
Mother not taking care of my son
Wierd situation. I have a son, 3 years old. I take him 2 days a week, mother has custody the rest of the time. His mother is married to another guy. Every time I go to drop my son off, every time I call to confirm pick up/drop off times, every time I have contact with her, my son is not with her. She is either taking a nap, going out to eat, getting her nails done, or doing something so she will not have to care for our son. Apparently her new husband is spending all HIS time with my son. My son is NOT being mistreated, he is well fed, well cared for, happy, and of course I'm glad my son is happy...BUT, this is NOT this guy's son, he's MY son, and in those times where we've all had to get together, my son definitely prefers being with me. Had I known she would pawn him off to her new husband, I never would have agreed to the arrangement I agreed to. Of course if confronted with this, she will deny it, she has lied through her teeth in court. Given this situation, do I have any type of shot at full time custody, or should I just let it go? After all, this is MY son....
2 Answers from Attorneys
Re: Mother not taking care of my son
Mr. Cheong's words are high-minded. However, you are by no means obligated to accept this moral advice.
Legally speaking, if you are the better parent of your child, and thus it is in your best interest that he live with you than your ex, you should go to bat and litigate. You have a right of Constitutional dimension -- the right to care for your own child, so long as you are a fit parent.
I would never be one to guarantee a "win" in any case. There are always facts to be learned, and this case is no exception. Many times, a "more fit" father loses in the first round, and even the second -- but could win later, as circumstances prove the reality.
You have three options: leave things as they are; make an alliance with step-dad, both for now and for when he ends up divorcing your ex, or litigate now. Litigating now will at LEAST demonstrate your real interest in raising your child.
Re: Mother not taking care of my son
Sometimes as attorneys, we are obligated to be more than messengers of laws but also counselors.
It seems to me as if you think that if the new husband dotes on your son and cares for him while he's with his mother, that makes you less of a father. That could not be further from the truth. You are your son's father and as long as you are a good father, no one will ever replace you.
Instead of thinking that some other man is being fatherly to your son, think how great it is that your son is being loved by so many people, not just his parents. If your son is happy, you should be happy also. As parents, our greatest obligation is to keep our children safe and happy. Always keep that in mind.
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