Legal Question in Family Law in California
Divorce Advice
I have been married for 10 yrs, 6 mos. I have 2 daughters 9 and 7. Almost 4 years ago, my wife unexpectantly told me that she didn't love me anymore and didn't want to be a mother any longer. After counseling and trying to work it out, she moved out 2 weeks later. She was gone a month. During that time my daughters stayed with me and visited her on her days off. A few times, she said that she wasn't going to take them because she couldn't handle it. We were at the title co. transferring our property back to my Grandfather, when she told me that she knew she was wrong, and wanted to come back and try again. Since then, she has told me 4 more times that she doesn't want to be married, but asks me to give her another chance, and I do for my daughters sake. I have been to a lwayer to start the proceedings the last 2 times. This last time, 1 week ago, is all I can take. She says she won't leave because ''she looked bad when she did''. What factors can be used for child custody issues. Can any ''emotional anguish'' issues be used? I am involved in every aspect of their life. We are buying property that has belonged to my family for over 30 yrs. My girls and I are all involved with animals and 4-h, which she has no interest in.
Please Help
3 Answers from Attorneys
Re: Divorce Advice
From the tone of your post, I get the feeling that you are afraid of losing your place in your children's life; afraid your wife will get custody of the children. I urge you to take a deep breath, and remember that what is important to a court, should custody be decided there, is the best interest of your children. That you have been the constant, primary care-taking parent (from your description) will be very important. That said, shared parenting is an important goal for the court, as I'm sure you would agree that the kids deserve the best of what each parent has to offer. I urge you to find a good attorney, which in my definition includes encouraging a minumum of antagonism between you and your wife in the settlement of custody and visitation issues. Best of luck to you - you sound like a great dad.
Reply: Divorce Advice
In a general sense, the legal issue will be what parenting plan serves the best interests of the particular children involved.
For a specific opinion regarding your individual circumstances, I suggest that you consult with an experienced family law lawyer. Experience is not expensive, it's priceless!
You will find some valuable information on various California family law issues including child custody issues at my web site.
Good luck to you!
Brian Levy, Esq.
www.calattorney.com
Re: Divorce Advice
The standard by which the court will decide the custody of the children is the "best interest" of the children, which is primarily a factual determination and not a legal determination. I suggest that you have a good child custody attorney who can lead you through the hoops. The court will certainly consider that she moved out and trusted you with the primary care of the children. Good Luck, Pat McCrary
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