My husband cheated on me back in November 2009 with a crackhead/prostitute that used to be my best friend. So Yes she hnew he was married because I knew her before I knew him. & he knew that she used to be my best freind and he did not like her or so he said. Anyway, He paid her for her sex. I found out about it in April of 2010 after being told that he had contracted Chlymidia and we both needed treatment. I had to start seeing a psychiatrist and a therapist as a result of this affair and go on several different types of depression medications. I suffer from insomnia and nightmares. I have haunting vivid images of the two of them together and the things that they did together... I just can not move past this. Our marriage is falling apart. He has grown distant and is now just no longer interested in me. I have suggested marriage counceling and he is uninterrested in that too. He is very deffensive at the slightest question that I ask him about how his day was. We no longer communicate. I ask him what is wrong and he simply says nothing and just walks away. I just can not take it anymore. I love him with evey fiber of my being. And it will kill me to walk away. We have 2 beautiful children together and will will hurt them just as much. But I am just so lonely even though he is sitting in the same room with me.. His cheating on me with her 3 (so he says) times destroyed our marriage. I have proof that he did it. I have his medical records from the health department that he stated he had a extrmarital affair and that he paid for sex and that he contracted chlymidia. I also have a taped confession from him from a conversation that we had one night. He has admitted it to my best friend who has actually came over to try and talk to us about salvaging our marriage. And he made personal calls to her cell phone from his work phone on the days that he went to go and see her that can be suppeonaed in court from his boss if need be as well as his time sheets that co- incide with the dates that my son was admitted into the hospital for his chemo treatments. That is when they did 2 of their sexual acts. Since she has no job and is a drug addict and has no personal possesions can I sue her for alienation of affection? I want that bitch to pay too for destroying my marriage. He is already going to pay. Because he is losing his family. & I think she should too. Women like that should be made to get off their backs and get a real job. And if they do not want to get a job, do them like they do the dead beat dads put their ass behind bars and teach them a lesson.
1 Answer from Attorneys
Can you sue her? It depends. Did the instances of marital infidelity take place in North Carolina? Was the most recent incident 3 or less years ago?
Assuming that you can sue her, what exactly are you going to get out of the deal if she is a crack ho'?
If she has no money and if your husband is not going to supply her with money to resolve the lawsuit, then alienation of affection suits, in my opinion, are a big fat waste of time UNLESS the threat of such action can be used as a bargaining chip in any divorce settlement to extract added alimpony or property.
For alienation of affection, you have to show that the extra-marital activities caused a loss of affection for you and that that is what led to the breakup. It sounds that things have not been going well in your marriage and she may try to defend on the fact that things werren't hunky dory to begin with. It is much easier, if you have proof, to sue for criminal conversation. Criminal conversation is basically her having sex with your husband while you were married. It is much easier and there are really no defenses - she either had sex or did not.
I know you have a lot of hurt feelings and this is a painful time. But suing someone else and making their life miserable is not the way to go. Litigation is very very expensive. Moreover, it ignores human nature - we have laws against all kinds of things (like murder, bank robbery etc.) and people still do it. Same with alienation of affection and criminal conversation. People are going to have sex outside of marriage if they have a mind to do so and all the laws in the world are not going to stop it. It is my opinion that these suits are an anachronism from our past and should be abolished as they have in a marjority of states. I caution that this is my personal opinion only and undoubtedly you will find many attorneys in NC that think these lawsuits are just dandy.
Instead of spending dollars on an alienation of affection/criminal conversation lawsuit, you should be talking to a family law attorney about getting a divorce. While you are consulting the attorney about divorce matters you can ask him/her about the viability of an alienation of affection/criminal suit against the crack ho'.